That's Not My Name!
by Niamh-Rain
Summary: Kurt is confused: Dave, Sam, Puck, Blaine, and the new guy Sebastian are all over him, and calling him strange nicknames. It was nice to hear until Kurt wondered if they forgot his name, and now he was going crazy. What's their angle? AU Completely. Kurtofsky Endgame


_**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or the song That's Not My Name, and no money is being made off this, thank you very much.  
**_

_**Title**_: That's Not My Name!

_**Rating:**_ T

_**Pairings: Kurtofsky main. **_Light Kurbastian, Hevans, Puckurt, and _very slight_ Klaine(not much, I can't do Klaine, but Blaine's a good guy in this.)

_**Summary:**_ Kurt is confused: Dave, Sam, Puck, Blaine, and the new guy Sebastian are all over him, and calling him strange nicknames. It was nice to hear until Kurt wondered if they forgot his name. AU Completely. A fun one-shot that got out of hand.

_**Warning:**_ Slash: M/M, Language, Humor, Light Fluff, AU Completely.

_**Note: **_A fun light-hearted _**one-shot**_ that should help me in finishing my other stories. It kind of got out of hand. The song is called _**That's Not My Name, by The Ting-Tings**_. It's a stupid song, but it got stuck in my head.

_Four letter word just to get me along  
It's a difficulty and I'm biting on my tongue and I_

"Hey Fancy! Nice pants," Dave Karofsky was the newest out and proud student at McKinley.

After a hectic year, Kurt had worked with the jock to get him comfortable in his own skin, and to be proud of who he was, and now here Dave was smiling in a very cute and charming way. He scooped Kurt's books wordlessly as he walked them to first period.

"Thank you, David."

It was going to be an odd year, and it was day one. They ignored people who might be observing them, but no one dared to speak out against Dave _the Fury _Karofsky, and although Kurt didn't condone violence, he did enjoy the slushy free zone.

Even Azimio nodded to Kurt as they passed the large man in the halls.

Dave handed his books back, and inclined his head. "See you later, Fancy."

After first period, Kurt was making a rush to his locker. Mercedes had kept him way too long after discussing her summer with Shane. Kurt liked Shane, and thought he was a perfect fit for Mercedes.

"Hey, honey," Blaine popped up, and Kurt arched an eyebrow.

Mercedes snickered, and patted Kurt on the back. "See you at lunch, boo."

"Alright, and hi Blaine. How's the transition so far?"

Blaine was bouncing on the balls of his heels, and his smile was way to wide. "It's not bad. I can't believe you talked about this place as being bad. It's nothing compared to my old school before Dalton."

"That's because they've had a lot of time to adjust to me, and now with David out of the closet, no one dares to cross anyone different."

Blaine bobbed his head. "So, what are you doing after school? You want to go to the Lima Bean, and get some coffee?" Casually, his arm dropped around Kurt who continued to remove things from his locker.

Kurt flashed Blaine a quizzical look. Last year, Blaine had been giving him mixed signals left and right. One minute he acted like he was over the moon about Kurt, and the next minute he was singing sex songs to strange GAP boys way too old for him.

Kurt had finally come to his senses, and gave up on the former Warbler, and decided that having Blaine as a friend was for the best. So, what was Blaine doing calling him cutesy nicknames?

"I don't know. We'll see, I have to go."

"Alright, see you." Blaine's features were bright as he bounced away, and Kurt shook his head wondering.

He gasped when a heavy weight collided into his back, and then familiar laughter reaching his ears. He tilted his head to the side in time to see Noah Puckerman standing right behind him, and his big muscular arms, which Kurt would deny to his grave were sexy looped around his waist, and a chin pressed to his shoulder.

"Hey Princess, you going my way?"

Kurt goggled. What the hell? "Noah?" Okay, he knew that Puck was a little out there, and he could see David and Blaine acting the way they did. Kurt had kind of become David's savior when everything was dark, and Blaine well, Blaine was Blaine. However, Noah Puckerman?

"What? Can't a hot dude like myself hang all over his gorgeous Prom Queen?"

"Why do you want to?" he asked letting his feet carry him with Puck on his arm. He was trying to ignore Puck's bulging muscles along his back, but damn if it wasn't hard. He hadn't realized how nice the guy felt.

"Why not? You're my Princess, and I have to say those jeans are killing Puckzilla." He hissed causing Kurt to gulp silently.

Kurt wiggled out of Puck's grip, and laughed hesitantly. "I have class now – er – see ya, Noah." He ducked into the class with a huff.

It wasn't even lunch, and Kurt was already having the weirdest day in history.

He was on his way to third period when Sam wolf-whistled for him down the hall, and a big goofy smile spread across his adorable boy next door face.

Kurt's heart warmed seeing Sam Evans. At the end of last year, Burt had worked something out with Sam's family so that they could stay in Ohio. Mr. Evans was now getting paid to receive his credentials as a mechanic, and Mrs. Evans had replaced their temporary worker at the desk to handle customer service.

"Hey, Sam," Kurt said smiling when Sam grabbed him in a big bear hug. "_Oomph!_ Sammy!" He was lifted off the ground by the strong boy, and laughed as Sam planted a kiss to his cheek. "What was that for?"

"For everything, sweetheart." Kurt's nose twitched, and his eyebrow rose as Sam sat him back down, and held his nicely shaped bicep out for Kurt to take. "Shall I take you to class?"

"Erm, sure," he said blushing as he gently gripped Sam. His fingertips enjoying the feel of all muscle.

Last year, half of the guys wouldn't so much as touch him, and now here they were all over him like he was some tasty treat that they couldn't resist, and what was with the nicknames?

_I keep stalling, keeping me together  
People around gotta find something to say now _

Kurt was heading to the cafeteria to meet Mercedes and the rest of the girls for lunch when a gorgeous tall boy rounded a corner. He had light green eyes, and had a never-ending smirk on his face. Those same eyes widened.

"Holy shit," he said raking his eyes over Kurt, and then cocked his head to the side. "Maybe public school_ isn't_ so bad, especially if they have students like _you,_ Doll Face."

Kurt choked. "... 'scuse me?" he stammered in shock.

The guy shook his head, and strolled right up to Kurt. They were the same height. "I apologize, I'm Sebastian Smythe. A new student, and I was looking for the cafeteria when I ran into something much better. You are?"

Kurt cleared his throat. Well, if he was new, who was he to be rude? "It's nice to meet you Sebastian. I'm Kurt Hummel!" he chirped holding his hand out.

Sebastian arched an eyebrow. "So you are," he took Kurt's hand, and brought it to his lips in a kiss. "You have become the love of my life, Doll Face. Why don't you show me to the cafeteria?"

"... Okay." Kurt's brain was now dead. Seriously, it was now fried, and Kurt's whole body was in danger of being set ablaze.

His face was burning, and he cleared his throat when Sebastian dropped an arm around his shoulder casually. "So, new here right?"

"That's right. Father thought I could use a new cultural experience," Sebastian said lazily. "Ohio is a long way from Paris."

Kurt perked. "Paris?"

"Mhmm, that's right Doll Face, I lived there for a year. Father couldn't handle my gay ways, and shipped me off to my aunts."

Kurt frowned. "I'm sorry."

"It's not so bad. I was supposed to go to Dalton, but I'm glad that changed." His eyes continued to look Kurt up and down appreciatively.

They arrived at the cafeteria, and Kurt elegantly slipped from Sebastian's arms. "Welcome to McKinley. I must go meet my friends. You can sit with us if you like." He waggled his fingers, and rushed off to where Mercedes and Shane were sitting together. "Gaga! Help me, Mercedes."

Mercedes turned, her eyes widened when she saw his reddened cheeks. "Boy, what happened to you?"

Shane arched an eyebrow at the expression on Kurt's face.

"Something has happened to all the boys in this school," he hissed quietly. "Maybe Coach Sylvester slipped something in their drinks or something! I don't know, but this has been the weirdest day in history."

"What are you talking about?"

"Fancy!"

"Princess!"

"Honey!"

"Sweetheart!"

"Doll Face!"

Kurt yelped, and very nearly fell from his seat as a horde of boys appeared around him so suddenly. All had smiles, and their eyes sparkling as they clambered to get a seat beside him.

Mercedes and Shane burst out laughing, and Kurt whimpered when Puck's fingertips grazed along his neck, Sam kissed his cheek, Blaine tried and failed to touch his hair when Kurt swatted it away. Dave winking and handing Kurt a bottle of ice water, and Sebastian who was sitting right across from Kurt giving him an eye-fuck of his life.

Kurt was sitting ramrod straight as Puck took the only available seat beside him, and smirked. He turned to Mercedes and Shane with the most pitiful expression. "_Help?_" he breathed as Mercedes choked on her tater tots.

Kurt wondered if this was a joke because all the guys were talking, and every now and then they'd glare at one another, and then shoot a cutting look at Sebastian who merely smirked.

Brittany and Santana walked by, and their mouths dropped when they saw all the guys clambered around Kurt. Santana quirked an eyebrow at Kurt who shrugged meekly while accepting a yogurt from Sebastian.

Puck and Sam glared as Dave offered up his ice cream, and Blaine offered a clean spoon.

"Well, Kurt, I must leave you now," Mercedes said with a grin. She looked like she was trying to hold her laugh. "I'll see you in glee, boo."

Kurt wanted to say no, but he didn't want to offend the boys who were being so nice and sweet. What the hell was going on? He gave her a desperate look, one that she ignored as she took Shane's hand.

"See ya, Kurt," Shane clapped him on the shoulder, and they were gone.

Kurt gasped when Blaine and Sam rushed to sit in Mercedes' old seat. Sam being the bigger one easily shoved the short boy to the floor with a smirk.

"So, Kurt, are you going to sing in glee today?"

"..."

All day long, Kurt was followed by either Dave, Puck, Sam, Blaine, or Sebastian. He didn't mind Sebastian so much because the boy was new, and he wanted to help him in every way possible. But, what was going on with the others? Why him?

Kurt gave a tired sigh as he fell into the nearest chair when he entered the choir room. He was panting slightly, and shot a glare at Mercedes who had followed him in with a laugh.

"Looks like they all finally woke up, and realized Kurty grew up," Mercedes sing-songed with a hand on her hip. "Look at my boy," she cooed tickling his chin.

"I've been asking the same question all day, Mercedes. _What the hell?_"

Mercedes sat beside him, and patted his knee. "Don't worry, boo. They'll move on soon. They are high school boys."

Kurt nodded. He only hoped so because he was a little on the terrified side.

Rachel was the third person to enter the room, and Kurt jumped up, and snatched her hand. "You, sit with me, now!" he ordered pushing her into the seat, and moving beside her.

Rachel blinked in shock. "You want me to sit with you?"

Kurt nodded, and Mercedes continued to laugh her ass off like it was the funniest thing. "Please don't leave me."

"Kurt? Are you okay? Is someone bullying you?" Rachel asked in concern.

"I only wish."

Mercedes' laugh got louder, scaring Finn when he came into the room next.

Sam and Puck ran into the room, and Kurt whimpered under his breath when they stopped, and glared at Mercedes and Rachel.

Mercedes was bowing her head, and Rachel looked perplexed. Kurt was counting to ten in French softly as he tried to ignore the muscle-heads. He did a pretty good job, but then he yelped when Sam and Puck slipped behind Kurt.

"Hey Princess," Puck flashed him a wolfish grin, and Kurt was staring fixated at Brad who was flipping through sheet music.

Rachel was looking at the boys in confusion, and then brightened. "I know you boys want to hear me sing, and all. I'm pleased you're so excited!"

Kurt resisted snorting and glanced back at Puck and Sam to get their expressions. They looked painful.

"Uh, right," Sam being the nicer one muttered before looking at Kurt. "You know Kurt maybe its time we have that duet together."

"..."

"No, he's going to do it with me, dude."

"He owes me a duet," Sam reminded. "So, I get to sing with him first."

Puck scoffed. "Fine, whatever."

_Holding back, everyday the same  
Don't wanna be a loner  
Listen to me, oh no  
I never say anything at all _

The next morning when Kurt pulled into his spot at McKinley, he hoped upon hope that all the boys would go back to the way they were the year before. Yesterday had been odd, and he could only believe that it was the summer blues, and everyone was looking to Kurt for a little excitement. Maybe Sam, Blaine, Dave, and the new boy was believable, but Puck? Surely, there were enough decent MILF's out there where he didn't have pick up on Kurt.

He braced himself for the second day of school as he glanced into the mirror, and pulled a stray hair out of his eyes. Snatching up his satchel, he slung it around his arm and head when he yelped as the door clicked open, and Kurt's mouth fell open when he saw Dave holding it open.

"Morning, Fancy."

Kurt blinked at him a moment before flashing a sweet smile. "Good morning, David," he tried not to sound surprised as he slipped out of the car. "You're in a good mood."

"I always am when I get to see you," Dave said with a crooked grin.

Kurt adored the light blush on Dave's cheeks as he held out his arm like Sam had yesterday. Unable to be mean to his little baby, Kurt circled his hand around it and chuckled. "I do like your arms, David."

Dave blushed again as he was led to the school. "Really?"

"Mhmm."

Dave took him to his locker, and then winked. "Have to get to the weight room. See you, Fancy."

Kurt sighed as he watched the bigger boy walk away with a skip in his step. He shook his head as he spun the dial, and squeaked when someone pressed against the locker.

"Morning, Doll Face," Sebastian flashed him a confident smirk.

Kurt cleared his throat as he popped the locker. "Good morning, Sebastian."

"You know, I was wondering-"

"Sweetheart!" Sam appeared, and Sebastian visibly scowled when the twink wrapped his arms around Kurt, and pulled him into his chest. "Hey you, have a good morning?" Sam asked slyly pushing Sebastian from his spot so that all Kurt could see was him.

"Uhm, yes, hi to you Sam." He gulped silently. Not this again! He had hoped it would be out of their system.

"You know, Doll Face," Sebastian popped up on Kurt's opposite side, and placed a hand on the small of the countertenor's slim back. "We should get together, and you can help me catch up on my school work."

Sam's eyes narrowed, but Kurt didn't notice as he bit down on his lower lip. "Sure, what are your classes?"

When Kurt took the schedule, Sebastian looked over the boy's head at Sam and gave him a smug look. "Well, let me walk you to class, and we can come up with something."

After first period, Blaine was by his locker with a smile. "Hey honey."

"..." Okay, now he was getting a little annoyed. Not because he suddenly had boys on all sides of him vying for attention, but because they seemed to think that it was better to use any other name except Kurt.

Did these people forgot what his name was? He hadn't heard his name from any of their mouths all yesterday, and now today.

He barely refrained from saying something as he smiled at Blaine's playful nature. "Hi, Blaine. You weren't in glee yesterday. I thought you were going to try out?"

"Oh, I was but I had to see Ms. Pillsbury. She's a little odd," Blaine said leaning against Kurt casually. "She's nice and all, but she acts like I'm going to throw a bucket of slime on her."

"That's about how she always looks."

"Save me a seat at lunch?" Blaine asked hopeful.

Kurt had a hard time resisting the boy's adorable eyes, and nodded. "Sure."

"Great!" Blaine clobbered Kurt with a hug before running off, and of course his presence was replaced by Puck who like Sam yesterday lifted Kurt from behind.

"Man you're light as a feather!"

"Gaahh! Noah!" he squeaked as the rebel chuckled roughly in his ear.

"Sorry, Princess. I wanted to see what I could lift with you." He waggled his eyebrows, and tugged Kurt into his chest.

Kurt's body flushed, and his cheeks burned as he lost all form of coherence.

"Noah!" He wiggled out of the boy's arms, and stared at him. "Are you alright?"

"Never better," Puck cheered. He then planted a kiss on Kurt's cheek before saying good-bye.

Kurt was left in the hallway with ruffled clothes, and a very hot face. He grumbled as he picked at his shirt, which was now off center because of boys.

His heart was beating fast, and he squeaked when Sebastian passed him, and whispered into his ear. "Doll Face."

All day, all fucking day Kurt didn't hear his name. All he heard was nicknames. Fancy, Sweetheart, Princess, Honey, Doll Face, and when Coach Sylvester shouted Porcelain, he had enough.

"THAT'S NOT MY NAME!" He shouted to no one in particular. He was going insane, and he was shouting at himself because of crazy knucklehead teenage boys.

_But with nothing to consider they forget my name  
(ame, ame, ame) _

Glee saw a healthy spike in members that day, and Kurt wanted to crawl underneath Brad's piano and huddle there until the end. Mercedes was in stitches as Dave, Blaine, and Sebastian all waltzed through the door to join the club as if it were a five star member's only exclusive, and not the most unpopular extra curricular activity at McKinley High.

Mr. Schuester was beaming. "You boys want to join up? That's great! Why don't you guys show us what you can do?"

"I shall go first," Sebastian said smirking as Puck and Sam glared, and Kurt swallowed. "Hello, Doll Face," he greeted with a bow toward Kurt.

Eyes rippled over to him, and Sam and Puck scowled openly.

"Sebastian," Kurt said trying to keep his breathing even.

Sebastian's tryout song was _If I Had You, by Adam Lambert,_ and he sang it while standing in front of Kurt. His voice was great, and his charistmatic attitude had Rachel and the other girls drooling. Kurt was blushing red whenever Sebastian's fingers took his hand, and at the end, he winked. "That's for you, Doll Face."

"Gaga," Kurt whispered as Mercedes nudged him playfully while everyone stood up clapping and shouting.

Much to everyone's surprise, Dave sang a _Michael Buble song, Save the Last Dance For Me_, and he pulled Kurt up to dance as the whole room joined in all except for Puck, Sam, Sebastian, and Blaine who were sulking in the corner.

Kurt shivered as Dave sang so perfect, so clear, and so in key as he twirled Kurt around the room with a shy smile.

"Thank you, Fancy," he said bowing at the end.

Mr. Schuester was clapping very loudly, and he looked delighted.

Blaine's song_ It's Not Unusual,_ and had everyone dancing the Carlton dance from Fresh Prince. It was hilarious, and Kurt laughed out loud when Blaine took him by the hand and swung him around. Kurt's fingers slipped out of Blaine's and he gasped as he prepared for a fall in mid turn, but Sam was suddenly behind Kurt. His hands were firmly planted on his waist.

"Okay there sweetheart?"

Blaine winked, and took Kurt away from Sam again with another twirl causing the Fashionista to become dizzy as Sebastian stepped in.

"I think the real new guy should get a chance. I certainly like the way you move in those jeans, baby," he purred into Kurt's ear when Puck came up behind, and literally picked him up.

"Don't hog my Princess."

"You're Princess?" Sebastian looked very doubtful.

"Yeah, he's my Princess. He always has been, he just don't know it, Prep School."

"Funny, I never heard him claim you."

"You just wait, it's only a matter of time."

Blaine was now doing an odd jig with Kurt who kindly wiggled away feeling light-headed and tired. He tried to ignore Sebastian and Puck as he stood next to Sam and Dave.

"You okay?" Sam asked.

"Hm."

"Too much for you, Fancy?"

"Hm."

The music died down, and Sebastian and Puck quickly moved away from one another, but not before glaring fiercely as if they were rival gang members.

"You're out of your mind, Prep School. No one can resist Puckzilla."

"You sure about that? I believe my Doll Face would have way too much class for someone like you."

Puck looked ready to pounce, and Mr. Schuester was oblivious as he cheered at Blaine and Dave.

"Sebastian?"

"Yes, Mr. Schuester?" Sebastian continued to glare at Puck.

"You are all free to join. We could use the new voices in our club! This is going to be a wonderful year. I just know it."

"You all would sound so good with my voice!" Rachel said cheerfully. "We should all pair up, and we can test your voice with mine, and see who compliments me the most."

Sebastian, Blaine, and Dave stared down at the little girl.

"I want to sing with Doll Face, and Doll Face only."

"Hey! I've known him longer. I think I get dibs on singing with him," Blaine said defensively as he stood beside Kurt. "Isn't that right honey?"

"He still owes me a duet. So you dudes are going to have to wait," Sam interjected coolly. "You don't mind do you, sweetie? I really would like to have that duet with you. You never gave me a chance."

Kurt was frozen where he stood, and his eyes were big and round. His cheeks were colored, and Mercedes was laughing behind them all at his expense.

Santana and Brittany were assessing the situation with curious cat-like eyes, and Rachel looked affronted.

Tina and Mike were all sorts of confused, and no one knew what happened to Quinn. Artie was watching from his place by Brittany, and wondering if his friends had lost their minds or something.

Mr. Schuester was considering their proposals. "You know, Kurt's range is rather extensive. It could work."

"What? No!" Rachel squawked.

"Shut up, Man-hands! No one was talking to you," Santana sneered angrily. "You know, it would be hot all that boy on boy?" She licked her lips at this causing Sebastian, Blaine, and Dave to shudder.

"Kurt sings like an angel," Brittany chirped causing the guys who have never heard Kurt to stare at him.

Kurt still couldn't form words. He was way too freaked out by everyone's sudden change in behavior.

"Fancy? I'd like to have a shot at singing with you," Dave's voice was quiet and hopeful. He pulled at Kurt's heartstrings as he gazed over at the jock.

"You sing beautifully," he complimented causing the other boys to bristle with jealousy.

Dave brightened. "Really? I – never really sang anywhere other than the shower. My parents tried to get me to join the choir, but that's not my thing. I'm only here to help you."

"Doll Face?"

"Sweetheart?"

"Honey?"

"Princess?"

All the boys clambered around him, and he was slowly starting to suffocate. They were all making loud suggestions to Mr. Schuester about who gets to sing with Kurt first until Kurt's heart began to race faster and faster.

"I gotta go!" Kurt pushed between Sebastian and Sam as he ran from the room at lightning speed.

_They call me 'hell'  
They call me 'Stacey'  
They call me 'her'  
They call me 'Jane'  
That's not my name  
That's not my name  
That's not my name  
That's not my name _

"Somewhere to hide, somewhere to hide!" He froze in the middle of the hall, and ignored Pre-Madonna Quinn who had walked by with her wild hair. He needed somewhere that they wouldn't find him. He was going nuts.

"Kurt?"

"Bad time! Bad time, I have to hide. I have to-"

"Doll Face!"

"Wait up, Fancy!"

"Did I say something?"

"Puckzilla will save you!"

Kurt screamed. "Ahhh!" He ran down the hall and turned a sharp corner until he found himself by the door of the boy's weight room. He huffed as he placed his hands on his knees, and looked over his shoulder when footsteps could be heard. "Shit!" Kurt rushed into the last place he was usually seen in, and saw Azimio sitting on the bench doing curls.

"What's up with you?" Azimio asked seeing the flushed face, and scared expression.

"Please, please, please! I'll let you slushy me later or whatever, but first hide me! Please, Azimio!"

"Doll Face!"

"PRINCESS!"

Kurt let out a whine, and Azimio gawked. "What the fuck?"

Kurt hid behind a rack of weights, and Azimio moved to stand in front of them using his whole body to block Kurt from being found.

Azimio had no idea what was going on, but he knew that his buddy Dave was madly in love with Kurt. If there were others trying to encroach on his boy's territory, gay or not, he would put a stop to it. He never hated the Fancy Pants, Kurt Hummel. He never had a problem, his cousin Wade was a transgender, and he was the coolest person Azimio ever met. Maybe Kurt could meet him? He'd certainly done a number on Dave, and Azimio had never seen the guy so happy in his life.

It had been all Dave last year leading the pack against Kurt. When he found out why, he was upset that his best friend since elementary school would think so little of him. That had hurt, man, and he hadn't liked it.

_They call me 'quiet'  
But I'm a riot  
Mary-Jo-Lisa  
Always the same _

Kurt was holding his breathing as best as he could when he heard footsteps.

"Yo! Z, you see my Princess?" Puck asked with his hands on his hips.

"Your Princess? Who the fuck you talking about this time, Puckerman?" Azimio asked when Sam came through with a pained look.

He was looking around the room when he spotted Azimio. "Oh, sorry, dude. I was looking for-"

"Doll Face? You in here?" The new guy poked his head in, and soon after the other new guy, this one short, and hobbit looking goggled when he saw the big black man standing at the weights.

"I don't know what you boys been smokin' but there ain't a single person in here, and I know, I know you ain't callin' me _your_ Princess." What the fuck was wrong with these guys? Did they accidentally down a bottle of Viagra or something? Chasing Kurt around like he was a female dog in heat, and they were on the trail of his scent. What the fuck! It was no wonder Kurt was so fucking terrified.

Dave better not be taking this approach.

"Oh, sorry, dude."

"He wouldn't come in here!" Sam replied. "We should check outside."

"Why wouldn't he come in here?" Sebastian asked.

Puck scowled at Prep School. "This room is asking for trouble from the puckheads."

Blaine bit his lip. "Think we scared him?"

"You scared him, short shit!" Sebastian snarked as he looked Azimio up and down once. "Huh." He turned, and headed out of the room. Nothing in there was of interest to him.

Puck puffed his chest out. "I'd never scare, Princess!"

"I'm harmless," Sam quipped.

"Harmless my ass, now get out of here so I can finish, you nitwits!"

They were gone, and Kurt fell to the slimy floor with a childish whine. "What the fuck?" he asked to the ceiling for the thousandth time.

Azimio peered down over the weights at the frazzled boy. "You got a problem on your hands, Hummel."

"You said my name!"

"Those idgits forget it or something?"

"One would think. What is wrong with these guys? Just last year they wouldn't come near me, and now-"

"They all up in your ass, boy! You better lay down the law, and soon."

"I don't know what to do!" Kurt whined. "Sam is too sweet to tell off. Sebastian is new so I have nothing against him, and he is legitimately gay. Blaine is weird because he didn't like me at all last year, even when I confessed I liked him. But I don't anymore, and Puck is scaring the shit out of me!"

"What about my boy?" Azimio asked bluntly.

Kurt's eyes lit up. "David is so sweet. He's my little baby."

"Huh, weird." But he liked Kurt's answer.

"I just wish they'd stop using so many nicknames! I mean, I like them, and they're flattering, but I get so confused! It's like they don't even remember my name, and Sebastian I bet he doesn't know my name!"

_That's not my name  
That's not my name  
That's not my name  
That's not my name _

"I need a way out of here," Kurt said softly finally standing and dusting off his pants. There was a shwoosh, and he caught whatever was thrown to him in reflex. It was a big gray hoody.

"Get the hell out of here, Hummel before I witness your cherry popping!"

"Thanks." Kurt donned on the sweater, and pulled the hood up before fleeing the room like a criminal.

Azimio merely shook his head as Dave came through the room looking sullen.

"You boy! You have any idea how much you boys are scaring the hell out of Hummel?"

"What? He was here?"

"He was hiding! I'm glad you didn't give chase."

Dave shrugged. "I figured I scared him off."

"I don't think you did. I think it was Puckerman and the new kids. Man, you need to step up before one of them does. He likes you."

"Does he?" Dave wasn't so sure anymore.

Azimio snorted. "You're blind, D if you don't see it. Now get out of here, and get your boy."

oOo

Kurt was pacing the living room that evening. His hands were tucked inside of Azimio's gray hoody, and this was how the entire family found him.

"Dude, what happened today?" Finn asked dropping his stuff.

Kurt started babbling, and making absolutely no sense. He would pause, look at his father, and then start pacing again while babbling about things like, _'doll face, sweetheart, and that's not my name!' 'What the hell is wrong? What's going on? Why is this happening?'_

"KURT!" Burt shouted causing Kurt to freeze, and stare at his father like a baby deer caught in a set of headlights. "What's wrong, buddy?"

"Boys," Kurt whimpered. "Boys and more boys. They won't leave me alone. They follow me, call me nicknames, they want to sing with me, and they- they _chase_ me!" he whined childishly. "All so nice, and I'm going to snap, and I'm going crazy..."

Burt frowned. "What's he talking about, Finn?"

Finn looked confused. "Well, everyone seems to be acting strange toward Kurt. Puck for one, and then Sam, and Blaine, and the new guy Sebastian is that his name?" Kurt merely nodded. "Then there's Dave, and its weird they all want to be around Kurt. They came by the glee club trying out, and Kurt kind of ran away because all the guys were fighting over singing with him."

Carole smiled. "Awe, they want to sing with you? Isn't that good though?"

"It is if they could remember my name!" Kurt declared. "I get called everything, but Kurt! My name is Kurt Hummel! _Not Doll Face, Honey, Sweetheart, Princess, Baby, or Fancy. I am Kurt! Kurt, dammit!_"

Burt was perplexed, and Finn was staring at Kurt as if he had two heads. Carole smiled endearingly as he wrapped her arm around Kurt's shoulders. "Honey-" she paused when he glared briefly. "_Kurt, _they're not doing it to tease you or annoy you. They like you, and so they're coming up with ways to express their feelings. You know teenage boys rarely have any sense these days." She looked at her own son.

"But – why now?"

"Things change."

"They all can't be gay! Sebastian, Blaine, and Dave are, but Sam and Puck are not! Why are they all suddenly clamoring to be around me when last year they barely touched me."

"Boys can be weird sometimes," Carole said petting his hair gently.

"I was at Dalton for a better part of the year, and Blaine barely acknowledged me as anything more than a good friend. Now, here he is in my school hugging me, calling me honey, and wanting to be around me twenty-four-seven! David, I understand. He's my baby, and I helped him a lot this summer, and I can't fault him, and I can't yell at him. I could never yell at him. Sam is too sweet for his own good, and Noah – oh Prada – Noah is just Noah, and he gets crapped on by Quinn and Santana and the other girls, and so I don't have the heart to do that to him even though he's terrifying me. Sebastian is new, and I don't want to kick him to the curb because he might need me, and I'll feel really bad. So what do I do?"

"Enjoy it?" Carole suggested.

Burt squawked. "Carole!"

"What, honey? Just imagine all the big boys who can protect Kurt," she pointed out logically.

The Hummel Patriarch paused at that, and sighed. "You're right, I guess. It's weird, I better go polish my shotgun. I might need it."

For once Kurt didn't object, and Finn fell onto the nearby chair. "Puck likes you?" he asked confused.

Kurt shrugged. "I don't know what Noah is thinking!"

"Who's sweater?" Carole asked looking it over.

"Azimio's."

Finn's eyes widened. "What?"

"I was hiding from the boys," Kurt whispered with a blush. "Azimio helped me hide, and then gave me his hoody to escape."

"Oh, really? I thought he hated you?"

"He's David's best friend. I doubt he could hate me now if he ever did." Dave had told Kurt that it had never been Azimio's intention to bully Kurt, and that it had been all his. It had taken a lot for Dave to fess up, and the boy had been close to tears in fear of Kurt hating him.

Kurt couldn't hate someone who was in so much pain. He sighed heavily. "I'm going to my room. I have homework, and I have stuff to think about."

Carole hugged Kurt close. "Don't let it get to you dear. You should stop over thinking everything. This is a good thing, Kurt. You now have people who want to be around you."

"Or people who want in my pants," Kurt muttered dropping his voice low so that Finn and his father in the other room milling about in the closet couldn't hear him.

Sighing, Carole nodded. "Some of them, probably. Go with your gut instinct. It always works, Kurt." She kissed his forehead motherly, and Kurt smiled.

"Thanks Carole."

oOo

Kurt looked at Coach Beiste and Sylvester as if they had lost their minds. It was gym time, and Kurt absolutely despised gym class. He had gone down with the girls to get changed, and when he came up he saw the football team on one side of the gym and New Directions on the other.

Kurt adjusted the irritating shorts, and the red McKinley T-shirt. He hated the gym clothes, they had absolutely no character. Although, he had accessorized it by tying it on the side with a white scrunchy, and a black shiny skull broach pinned to his chest. He was standing beside Mercedes as they were told that dodge-ball was to be played between them in hopes of the football team and New Directions settling their differences.

"I think we've settled our differences just fine," Mercedes said smirking at Kurt as she said this. "We haven't been teased or slushied since we returned.

"That is beside the point. Now, we're allowing you to choose your group, but you have to have a mixture of football players and glee club members."

"No problem! Over here, Princess!" Puck stepped out with his muscles flexing.

Sam glared. "Then I'll have to join with Puck." Blaine wordlessly followed Sam.

"Me to," Sebastian said gliding across the room as Kurt was nudged by Mercedes.

"Go on white boy!"

Kurt took in a deep breath, and walked the floor to stand beside Dave who had wordlessly joined them.

Soon the teams were broken up into an even number. All of Kurt's boys gathered around him with the added addition to Azimio who was always on Dave's side. Quinn was hustled from the under some bleachers to join in whether she wanted to or not.

No one crossed Coach Sylvester.

_I miss the catch if they through me the ball  
I'm the last kid standing up against the wall_

Kurt stood off to the side looking tediously bored as Coach Sylvester blew the whistle, and balls started rushing. Kurt ducked and danced out of the way of the few that tried to hit him, but otherwise he remained in the back, and watched all the guys nail balls one after the other toward the other team. Kurt was examining his nails, and waiting to be hit so he could be 'out' and sit down on the bleachers. However one ball headed his way from Rachel Berry, and Blaine decided to block it by jumping in front causing him to be out of the game.

"You should have let it hit me," Kurt tutted.

"No way, I'm your courageous knight, Honey."

Kurt twitched at the name as Blaine chuckled and tossed the ball to Kurt who sighed, and rolled it around in his hands.

Santana very nearly bashed her ball into Sam if it hadn't been for Puck coming to his defense. Kurt spun his around idly while watching everyone go at it.

All the boys seemed to be protecting him. When one got close, Puck, Sam, Dave, Sebastian, or Azimio would block it with their own balls.

Sebastian bodily moved him out of the way, and smirked when his fingers crawled down Kurt's back. "Nice," he hissed in Kurt's ear. He yelped when Sebastian slapped him on the butt.

"_Sebastian!_"

"Very perky." He danced away from Kurt's claws with a wink.

Boys collided with him, pushing, pulling, and throwing him behind them as Quinn was knocked flat on her bum with a scowl.

Sam was the next to go down after taking a nasty hit from a vengeful Santana who owned all things dodge-ball.

Kurt was deliberating whether to join in when Azimio rushed by him, scooped him up with one arm, and planted him down beside Dave in a matter of seconds.

"Don't move, Hummel."

It seemed that Santana seemed to get the hint that everyone was willing to defend Kurt against the onslaught of dodge-balls, and was whispering to Finn who was nodding furiously, but also frowning.

Kurt's eyes narrowed as he watched. The others were completely oblivious.

"David, they're planning something, and it involves me."

"I know," Dave said motioning for Puck and Sebastian. "They're going to pelt Fancy. They know we're protecting him."

Kurt was still playing with his ball.

"Get ready boys!" Santana called out with a leer as she swayed her hips toward the edge of the line.

Kurt peaked around Azimio's large body, and noticed all the people in the stands watching. Mercedes and Shane were grinning widely, and Sam and Blaine were sulking together at being thrown out.

Every single ball shot out toward them at the same time Kurt's team threw theirs. Kurt had disappeared from behind them and ran the length of the gym. No one noticed him because they thought he was behind Dave, and then when Sebastian and Puck went down from Santana's ball, he threw his as hard as he possibly could. He might have hated sports all his life, but his dad had taught him how to throw. He was no idiot.

The ball slammed into Santana's side causing her to gasp and fly back onto the ground in shock. Her eyes were wide, and everyone looked over at Kurt who was now throwing another, and hit Finn in the side of the head before going for Brittany.

Azimio and Dave quickly gathered theirs and the rest of the team was history.

Santana was furious, and Kurt decided that for the first time since he entered High School that changing in the boy's room was a good idea.

"Holy Shit, Fancy! Where did you learn to throw like that?" Dave asked once they entered the boy's locker room.

The place seemed foreign to Kurt who was holding the satchel that he'd gotten from Mercedes because she to feared for his life. He was a little jittery at being surrounded by all boys who at one time wanted to beat him to a pulp, Blaine and Sebastian excluded.

He held his nerves in well, but Dave saw the fleeting anxiety, and so did Sebastian.

"I may hate sports, but dad did teach me how to play catch so long as he suffered through my pedicures afterwards."

"That was fuckin' awesome!" Azimio crowed.

"Now, I'm terrified, Santana's going to be after me something hot," Kurt shuddered.

"Don't worry, Princess, we'll protect you."

Kurt laughed nervously as he turned on his heel, and went to look for a private place to change. He wouldn't admit to the fact that his hands were shaking, and not because of Santana. What if their new found behavior suddenly changed, and they started accusing him of looking at them?

He found the bathroom stalls, and quietly slipped into one. He barely picked up the dismayed groan from Sebastian.

Kurt stepped out of the stall a few minutes later, and did well to keep his eyes on the ground as he moved to the mirror, and scowled at the wrinkle in his Gucci top. No matter how well he folded it, the soft fabric always became wrinkled.

He messed with his hair, and scowled some more as it went out of place. To be honest, he was mainly doing it to keep down on the feeling of being sick. He was afraid of looking to the right or left that he would be accused of doing something. Kurt didn't want to believe the worst out of these guys, not now, but sometimes it was hard to shake old habits.

"What's wrong?" Sebastian was suddenly standing there making Kurt flinch as if he'd been slapped.

Kurt's heart jerked, and he shook his head. "Nothing."

"Then why are you giving a face like you're about to start crying? I don't like it so you should stop, Doll Face."

Kurt continued staring straight ahead at Sebastian's handsome reflection. "Are we alone?"

"You wanna be?"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Seriously?"

"Seriously? For the most part, yeah. Why?"

Kurt closed his eyes. "Not two years ago the same guys we played with today were the same ones who'd beat me to a pulp if I went anywhere near the boy's locker room." Sebastian frowned at that. "So, yeah, it's kind of frazzling my nerves to be down here. I'm afraid any minute that their sudden friendliness will be taken from me." When his voice quivered, Sebastian winced, and resisted the urge to clutch at his chest.

It was unusual for Sebastian to feel bad for anyone, even a future conquest, but Kurt was sure pulling on his strings. That was not nice.

"All I've ever wanted was to be accepted by the guys, and now I am and I'm afraid it's going to be yanked away."

"I doubt that. Big boy over there, the white one of course, keeps looking at you like he's in pain."

Kurt winced. "I don't want to think the worst of David," he murmured. "He's changed so much."

"Uh huh."

"Noah to."

"Hm."

He shook his head. "Well, it's over with. Let's go, I'm ready to meet my doom against Santana Lopez. If I believed in God, I'd be praying right now."

He found all of the guys standing outside of the boy's room, and clambered around Kurt as Santana's fierce glare bore a hole right through the pack of testosterone.

"You won't always be surrounded by brutes, Lady Lips. You just wait, I owe you one."

_Keep up, falling, these heels they keep me boring  
Getting glammed up and sitting on the fence now  
So alone all the time at night  
Lock myself away_

Somehow, Kurt weaseled away from his little group at lunch time, and headed for the girl's empty restroom. For the first time since school started he was alone, and breathed a sigh of relief as he pushed the door open.

He splashed some cold water on his face, and proceeded to fix himself better than he had in the boy's locker room. He'd been too nervous to do a good job, and even Mercedes had commented on how he didn't look his usual perfect self.

He plucked at the shirt again. It was a very thin piece of fabric, and light blue, which made his eyes stand out. It was thigh length with a few wrinkles in the chest and back. It felt good against his skin, so good in fact that he didn't even wear a undershirt like he usually did. He had on black leggins inside of a set of boots with a cloth thick belt around his waist.

The door opened, and Kurt was surprised to see Dave standing there. He looked sad.

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked whirling around.

"I'm sorry."

Kurt placed a hand on his hip, and tilted his head. "Why are you sorry?"

"I – I don't know. I guess, I just – I saw how scared you were today, and I didn't like it."

Kurt blinked, and then waved his hand. "It's not your fault."

"Some of it is."

"No, honey it's not. You were scared back then, and I understand."

"Still, I don't – I don't think I could ever handle seeing that on your face now. Not after everything you did for me this summer."

Kurt's eyes softened. "I did it because I wanted to, David. Everything about how I felt about you changed when you stood in front of me in the hallway, and apologized. I forgave you that very second, and then you asked me to wait for you. I took that as a double meaning."

Dave bowed his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. "It was a double meaning. I – I didn't think you'd read into it that much."

"I read into everything. I look behind the curtain, and I see everything that people don't tell me. Yes, I was a little anxious about going into the boy's locker room, but I did it."

"Still, it scared you. I don't want you to be scared of me."

"I'm not."

"Really? Are you sure?"

Kurt used very sure steps as he shortened the distance between them. Dave was a good three inches taller even though Kurt was tall, and had heels on. He reached up, and caressed Dave's cheek. "You are my baby, David. My little baby, and I'm not giving up on you no matter what."

Dave's eyes fell closed. He dropped his arms, and planted his hands gently on Kurt's waist. "You're too good to me."

"I take care of what's mine. It's how I do things, sweetie." He pulled Dave in for a hug, his slim wrists looping around Dave's neck, and he pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Dave took in a deep breath, and clutched the boy tighter. "You feel so good, Kurt."

Kurt throat tightened as his heart swelled. "You said my name."

Chuckling, Dave brushed his nose along Kurt's neck causing a shiver. "I did."

"You know my name," Kurt giggled in relief.

"Yes, why wouldn't I know the boy I fell in love with?"

Kurt bit his lip at the confession. "I guess – I like being called Fancy. Its the other guys, they were calling me all these names, and I was so confused and worried. I overreacted to a stupid situation."

"Nah, I get it. You had guys chasing you the other day. What is with that by the way?"

"I don't know! But I thank your friend, Azimio for hiding me."

Dave laughed. "Yeah, he told me."

"I have his sweater still. I'll give it back to you later. I'm going to kiss you now, and it'll be my second kiss."

"I'd prefer it to be your first."

"No, it's my second." His lips brushed along Dave's tenderly, and their mouths opened together, as Kurt tilted his head accepting Dave's taste into him as their lips rubbed in sync. Kurt's tongue flicked across Dave's lower lip causing the bigger boy to push him gently to the wall, arms still tight around him, and hold him tighter as he resisted the groan.

Dave reluctantly pulled back, and shivered when he saw Kurt's lips swollen and red, and his eyes fluttering heavily. That was a look that Dave could get used to.

"Damn! It's about fucking time!" Puck crowed causing both of them to jump as he and Sam filed into the room with Sebastian and Blaine at their heels. "We thought you'd never get together." He pretended to be panting as Sam nudged him.

"Stop being a dumb ass!"

"What the hell?" Kurt and Dave looked at the boys.

Blaine huffed. "Don't ask me, I wasn't in on anything. I wanted Kurt!" he folded his arms over his chest.

"You were too late, shorty," Puck snarked as he crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "Besides, you couldn't handle the Queen, and Dave is the Prom King, dude. It was just meant to be and all that bull shit."

"We're sorry for scaring you, Kurt," Sam said bashfully. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "We knew you two needed help because of all the past problems, so Puck and I thought if we put our heads together we could help out. I mean, I do like you and all, but you're always smiling when you're around Dave these days. It's a small sacrifice for everything you and your father has done for my family."

"Hey! What about me? I can handle Doll Face just fine," Sebastian scoffed. "So what does he have that I don't?"

Dave rolled his eyes, and Kurt shook his head. "I've been waiting for David."

Sebastian scowled once more as he leaned over and kissed Kurt's cheek. "Whatever, Doll Face. I could have had you, but I suppose I was too late." He winked and turned to Sam, and arched an eyebrow. "So, Luscious Lips, _what kind of things can that gorgeous mouth of yours do_?"

Kurt's head fell forward against Dave's chest as he laughed.

Dave was still holding him.

"And here I was thinking you boys had forgotten my name."

Sebastian actually flushed as Puck, Sam, and Blaine all laughed. "_Er_ – I might have for about ten minutes. _Sorry_, Doll Face, but your perky little ass made me forget everything."

_Listen to me, I'm not  
Although I'm dressed up, out and all with  
Everything considered they forget my name  
(ame, ame, ame) _


End file.
